Of Brothers and Billiards
by BlairSpinX
Summary: The Sparda boys have been competitive since as long as they can remember. This time's no different as they both agree to a risky game, sparking a fierce battle of wills which turns south for them and everyone else around them. VxOC DxT
1. Chapter 1

I knew my actions would catch up with me, and now here I am reaping the bitter fruit of what I have sown. I went against my better judgment, albeit just for a moment, but a moment was all it took. Well, that and a certain annoying presence...

* * *

 _~o~o~o~_ _(A few hours earlier)~o~o~o~_

The doors to the Devil May Cry flew open as Dante haphazardly kicked through the entrance. A few wood shards flew across the room from the impact, but miraculously the door itself remained hinged.

"Woo! That's what i'm talking about, what a job!" Dante sauntered through the door, disarming himself and shedding his trench coat.

Dante and Vergil had taken a job to clean out a nest that had popped up across town, of which, whose monsters had been wreaking havoc on the nearby inhabitants. It was actually a bigger job than either of them anticipated but they didn't complain, especially since the payout was impressively generous.

Dante was feeling especially giddy at the fact that not only did he get to slaughter baddies and get paid to cover food and whatever else for a couple of months, but he also got to do so with Vergil, which was something he didn't do very often; A kind of brotherly bonding outside of their occasional battles. Today was a good day.

Vergil walked in soon after, very much looking forward settling down for the remainder of the evening. It was almost nightfall and all he had on his mind after showering was a hot cup of tea, and a good book...Well maybe even a bit of a rendezvous with his woman. Speaking of which...

Vergil closed the doors and stopped, gazing around and listening. There seemed to be no sign of her anywhere. Hm...

"Hey babes, we're home!" Dante sat in his chair and kicked his feet up. When he got no response, he cocked an eyebrow.

"They're not here." Vergil answered his question before he could voice it.

Crossing Dante's puzzled gaze, Vergil began to head upstairs.

"Where'd they go?" Dante asked rhetorically.

Furrowing his brows, he fumbled to get his phone from his pocket. Looking at his screen, he saw that Trish had left him a text message a couple of hours earlier.

 _:Going to the flea market with Ari, be back soon. -xoxo-_

"They went to the flea market Verge, must still be there!" Dante was relieved, but slightly disappointed. He was looking forward to spending some time with his babe when he got home because he hadn't seen her all day. Now he had to wait a little longer...

So now what? He was sure that now that they were back home, Vergil would go back to his usual activities of reading and doing whatever Vergil does...which usually excluded him. It was just plain boring when it was only Vergil and him at the shop. How could he pass the time? Grabbing a magazine from his desk, he opened it in hopes of actually enjoying its contents but quickly found that he just couldn't.

"Last week's issue..." Dante mumbled, displeasure marring his features as he tossed the thing back to his desktop.

Dante groaned. Surely there had to be something to do around here to pass the time. He looked around and eyed his drum set across the room. He hadn't played it in a month or so, so maybe it would be good to get a little playtime in. Then again, he really didn't feel like playing it with no audience to enjoy the show. Lame.

His eyes slowly drifted over to his pool table. _Hm._ He could play a couple rounds of pool. The only problem is, he needed someone to play with. His eyes drifted to the top of the stairs. Maybe he could convince Vergil to play him. Who knows, since they spent time together today, he may be in an agreeable mood, enough so that he would agree to play a round or two. It was worth a shot.

...

Vergil left his room feeling thoroughly refreshed. Running a hand through his hair, he felt a light mist of water fly from his damp silvery tresses. Taking a deep breath, he briefly closed his eyes, as if letting the remaining effects of the day's events exit his being, leaving nothing but relaxation to take over. He descended the stairs, seeking to get that hot cup of tea before settling into a book.

It was much more lively downstairs since before he went to take his shower, but interestingly enough he still didn't sense his wife. He glanced at that old rundown jukebox in the corner as it played a harsh, but familiar tune. His head bobbed slightly with the beat as he made his way to the kitchen.

"Yo Verge..."

Vergil lifted a brow, directing his attention at Dante who was twirling a billiard stick in his hand. He watched him aim at a ball on the table, hitting and knocking a few in, before letting out a deep breath. He had a feeling he knew what his twin was about to say.

"Play me a round?" Dante smirked.

"I'm not interested Dante." Vergil continued to the kitchen.

Dante followed suit, having visibly deflated at being rejected. He watched as Vergil filled the silver teapot with water and set it on the stove top, turning it on.

"Aw c'mon Verge, you never want to hang with me! Just one game? That's all."

"You and I both know that's not possible with you."

Dante's jaw dropped in feigned shock, "What? Me? I don't know what you're talking about."

Vergil's bored gaze rested on his twin. He had made up in his mind that Dante had no idea what the number _one_ was. It didn't matter what Dante dealt with, it seemed he could never have just one. Ever. Regardless, Vergil knew better than to believe his brother's speels about _only one_ of anything.

"You and I both know, that you would not be satisfied with only one round of that game you seem to never tire of. Especially if you lose. I am not interested brother."

"What was that? Are you saying that i'd _lose_ to you Vergil?" Dante cocked his head to the side and crossed his arms.

Vergil redirected his attention to the boiling water, "I am saying I do not wish to play your game Dante. Leave me."

Dante glared at Vergil for a moment before a grin slid onto his handsome face, "Oh. Okay, just making sure. Because i'm undefeated, and there's _no_ way you would beat me."

Dante turned on his heels and began to head back into the office. But before he could leave, Vergil spoke again.

"That isn't going to work on me Dante. And for the record, you would certainly not defeat me. Billiards requires very little skill, it's not an exceptional feat to be good at it." Vergil took the whistling teapot from the stove and turned it off.

"Yeah right. It's also easy to talk trash when you aren't showing anything for it. Why don't you put up or shut up? Since it's so easy..." Dante had a smug expression on his face.

"What part of, _i'm not interested_ don't you understand?" Vergil's tone was flat as he poured water into his cup and tossed in a teabag.

"The _not_ part." Dante grinned as he turned to face Vergil again.

"You're annoying."

"And you're boring. So what?"

Vergil began to leave the kitchen, thoroughly aggravated by his brother's tactics. Surely if Dante had put this much energy into something worthy, it would be quite fruitful.

"What if we made it interesting? Y'know, make some bets or something?"

Dante was getting desperate. He knew that if he let Vergil disappear he'd be all alone with his friend boredom. He needed something to catch his attention and although he knew it was a risky thing to offer any kind of betting opportunities to Vergil, it was all he could come up with. He was out of options and he hoped he wouldn't regret this decision.

Vergil had stopped in his tracks and was quiet for what seemed like an eternity, but at least it seemed like he was considering it. Dante was hopeful.

"If you lose, you must wear a chastity device for a week." He would make him rue the day he couldn't just leave well enough alone.

Dante almost passed out on the spot. He did his best to not let on though...

"What? Are you...?"

"You _said_ you are undefeated, correct?"

"Yeah, but..."

"So then this _one game_ should be an effortless win for you." Vergil sipped his tea and Dante was silently horrified.

 _Great._ He just had to open the betting door and now it was coming back to bite him in the worst place possible. _Fan-freaking-tastic_. Vergil took the phrase 'evil sibling' to a whole new level. This kind of inhumane treatment was in a league of its own. There was no way. This was just too extreme.

"Yeah but, Trish wouldn't be happy about me gambling something like that." Dante stuck his chin out.

Vergil scoffed and sat down at the small dining table, leaning back and crossing his legs at the ankles as he took another sip of his tea.

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind at all if you're as good as you say you are. Well, what is your answer?"

"Actually, she still would mind. It's the principle of the thing, y'know."

"Sure."

"Well what about _you_ tough guy? You realize you got some risk in this too, don't you? And the level of severity must be _equal_ on both sides." Dante's grin widened.

"Right. Yet you've been babbling about nothing and still haven't stated your terms." Vergil's tone didn't reveal any sense of concern, his level of arrogance irked Dante to no end.

"So you really want to go there?" Dante secretly hoped Vergil would reconsider and offer a different condition. Preferably one that didn't have anything to do with his nightly playtime. Just the thought of a thing that locked up his "junior" gave him the shakes.

Vergil was silent as he stared in anticipation.

"Alright then." Dante began to pace and he rubbed at his stubble absent-mindedly.

He had to think of something that would get Vergil concerned and wipe that smug look off of his face. But what could he use as leverage? There weren't many things that would get Vergil to visibly stir, but he had to think of _something_. Hmm. Maybe...

Dante walked over to the cupboard and rummaged through it before reaching all the way to the back, pulling out a large bottle of Vodka. He slammed the poison onto the table and crossed his arms.

"If _you_ lose, which you will, you have to be a mini me for a week." Dante stated, quite proud of himself.

"Pardon?" Vergil narrowed his eyes.

Gotcha.

"You have to be a mini me for a week," Dante repeated, "That means you have to _act_ like me, _look_ like me, including what you wear, _and_ you have to answer to Dante jr."

Dante was inwardly laughing like a maniac when he saw Vergil's eye twitch slightly. Just the idea of Vergil being him for a week was pure gold and it made him more than determined to win. He would have to get it on tape too. Where did he put that camcorder...?

"You have lost your microscopic mind." Vergil growled, the look in his eyes was cold and threatening.

Dante grinned as he leaned down onto the table across from his mirror image, taking in the scowl that was being offered to him with the utmost joy. This was actually going to be fun.

"Well since you say I _certainly won't beat you_ it should be an 'easy win' for you, right?" Dante was absolutely enjoying this. "Now since I _am_ a reasonable man, i'll lay this out there too...If you wanna reconsider your terms, then i'll reconsider mine. So what'll it be big shot?"

"Surely _that's_ your goal in this now. If you're that afraid of losing brother, then you should just admit it." A smirk tugged at Vergil's lips as Dante glared at him.

"Ha! Is that what you're thinking? Get real." Dante snorted, "I know i'll win, but _you_ seem a bit worried yourself there pal, so i'm giving you a chance to make this easier on yourself."

Vergil snorted, "Well get your eyes checked, because you're seeing things." he finished his cup and set it on the table, "I won't reconsider."

Their narrowed eyes locked as they silently challenged each other. The bets had been laid out on the table, and now it was time to seal the deal or back out. Admitting defeat was neither of their style, so the decision was obvious.

Dante swallowed hard as he silently walked to the cupboard and grabbed two shot glasses, bringing them to the table and filling them. He picked up one of the glasses and held it in front of Vergil who glared at it before glancing back up at him. Vergil picked up the other glass from the table and clinked it against Dante's before they both downed the contents. A silent deal seal. Game on.

 _~o~o~o~_

* * *

Why did I allow the clown to entice me to engage in such behavior? Perhaps it was my own pride. Or maybe I was feeling slightly burned out from the day's events and decided a bit of unwinding would do some good. Or maybe I was pitying his sad state of feeling "neglected". Nevertheless, due to my engagement with his antics I am now, as they say, _in the doghouse_. Though I reluctantly admit, it was entertaining...

She looks so beautiful...even when she's angry with me. I don't like to see her upset, but at this moment I feel silence is best, so there is nothing I can do. I don't want to aggravate things further, i'll just wait until she speaks. It's inevitable, she hasn't said much of anything since returning and assisting me in getting to our bedroom to lie down, so i'm sure we will end up discussing this in the near future...She's been sitting and dabbling in her sketchbook for the passed thirty minutes, I wonder what she's drawing...

"Vergil."

It seems the near future was nearer than I thought.

"Yes darling?" those pouty little lips of hers look ridiculously kissable right now...

"Don't _'yes darling_ ' me, what were you two thinking?"

"I suppose we weren't."

It was true. That was the only explanation I could come up with. A moment of thoughtlessness. What else would explain my drinking to the point of disjointed babbling and laughing at things that aren't amusing? Not to mention the reckless destruction we left in our wake. At least there won't be any more mention of playing pool any time soon since the table is in pieces now... I'll assume that to be the bright side to this situation.

"I won't argue with you there. But you realize you and Dante are cleaning up that mess right? Trish and I are _not_ doing it."

Ugh...the light. I wish she would turn that light off. It's starting to aggravate my eyes, surely a side effect of the exceptional amount of alcohol i've had tonight...

"Understood."

"Good. But i'm still mad at you...why are you looking at me like that?"

I suppose from her perspective I have been staring quite a bit since she sat way over there in that...that...what is it again? This is infuriating...That _chair_ across the room. Yes, that's it. But if only you knew how lovely you are my distant little dove...

"Because you're quite beautiful."

"That's not going to work Vergil."

My head is starting to throb. I wish she would just stop talking and come lie down with me. Of course it would be unwise to say that out loud right now, i'm sure... She's looking at me with those eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"You won't smooth talk your way out of this one."

"A smooth _touch_ perhaps?"

Where did that come from? Damnable alcohol... I shouldn't have said that. Who am I, my brother? Never. But I do admit, even I experience fleeting moments of perversion when in her presence. The thoughts that prance through my mind when I lay eyes on her...some fantasy, some from memory...No wait, don't leave...

"Where are you going?"

" _I'm_ going to sleep in the guest room tonight while you sleep this off. That way, you can reflect with no distractions."

No.

"...So this is my punishment?"

"Yep. Sorry love. When you are hungover tomorrow and take a look at the office downstairs, then you'll understand clearly."

The hangover. I am definitely not looking forward to that. Perhaps I can sleep the entire day away and avoid it. However, I doubt she will allow me to do such in peace since there is a mess I must clean. This is all Dante's fault...Not to mention...What was the outcome of our game? ...Wait. I remember.

"And there is no chance you will reconsider?"

"Nope."

Damn.

This is cruel, and I'm sure I look somewhat pathetic at the moment. I absolutely abhor the way this night unfolded now. How could I have been so careless? Now I must sleep alone, something I haven't done in about a year. Regardless, Dante will surely pay for this.

"I love you. Goodnight Vergil."

"...I love you too...goodnight...A goodnight kiss before you leave perhaps?"

Judging by the fact that she just left the room...I'll take that as a no.


	2. Chapter 2

"...!"  
 _" ..gil"  
" vergil..."  
" VERGIL!"_

The light...the blasted light...I can barely open my eyes. Great, here comes the pain. A taunting reminder of my foolish actions. A ghost from a very near past. My head feels like its spinning, I need to go back to sleep immediately. Did she have to open the curtains...? I can hear her coming down the hall...Perhaps if I feign deep sleep, she will have mercy on me and leave me be. This throbbing headache and intense sensitivity to light should be punishment enough. Must she force me awake ridiculously early as well? Not to mention the way she left me to myself last night...

"Rise and shine Vergil!"

Surely with this pillow over my head, she won't suspect me being awake. No wait, give it back...

"Let's go Vergil, it's morning and the office needs to be tidy before job calls start coming in. Up. Now."

I pitifully admit that watching her throw my pillow out of my reach has me feeling quite...what's a good word? Compromised. Yes. With the room spinning before my eyes, the sunlight burning into my retinas, and the unquenchable urge to vomit, to put it plainly, I feel like crap and have no desire to even move a toe. Regardless, I suppose she is not going to give me any other choice but to pay my dues and rectify the situation i've made for myself. Perhaps...

"Ari..."

"Hm?"

"Could you come here for a moment?"

This is my only chance to try and find another solution to my dilemma. After all, this wasn't necessarily _all_ my fault. I was lured by a grinning pest into a foolish web, weaved intricately into a downward spiral with fermented drinks and crude taunts. Of course, I knew the outcome even before I agreed to his games. Hm... Have I gone crazy? What else would explain my knowingly walking into this atrocity?

...I feel like I am about to die.

Note to self: six bottles of anything, whether part of a game or not, is not smart.

She's sitting next to me now, staring. Undoubtedly awaiting the reason for my request for her attention...Her hand is incredibly soft; she's watching me with curious eyes. Yes, this is good. I will maintain eye contact with her while I kiss her hand as a symbol of submission. Hmm...Perhaps i'll glide my hand up her thigh...just like this. She's sighing. Yes my darling, give in to me and listen to my words...

"I've reflected on my actions and I realize the error of my ways. It's only right to handle the mess that I have made. However, I feel in order to ensure the job is done properly, I should allow myself a little more time to reach my full capacity. This hangover has me sorely impaired."

"Aw, poor baby."

Her embrace is so warm. She's rubbing my hair now. An indication of understanding perhaps? Yes, I can see it in her eyes as she's gazing at me now.

 _Jackpot._

...

I retract my previous exclamation. Even now as I walk down these creaking stairs I fail to understand how women can be so cruel. What I assumed was a gaze of compassion was merely a facade to mask what was coming next. She turned the radio on and blasted it to the high heavens, leaving the room and forcing me out of bed in order to stop the noise. Of course i'm sure she won't be happy to know that I hurled the thing off the balcony. Apologies to the yelping dog it landed on.

Hm. It seems _he_ has been forced from sleep as well...

* * *

Dante sat on the couch in a slump, his elbows resting on his knees and his chin in his hands. His eyes struggled to keep themselves open as he sat unmoving, reluctant and utterly aggravated. If looks could kill, Dante's lazy eyes would have floored anyone who passed his gaze at that moment. Dante was not a morning person and he definitely wasn't one when he only got two hours of sleep the night before.

Vergil dragged his feet as he descended the stairwell. Glancing around, he began to survey the damages caused by him and his twin from only a few hours ago. Dante's desk had been completely trashed; empty liquor bottles littered the dark top, along with ripped magazines and what seemed to be smashed food. Shifting his gaze around the room, Vergil observed beer bottles standing in various places on the hardwood floor, the tall shelf that usually held random trinkets and knick-knacks had been toppled over and the couch itself was newly charred on one side.

But it didn't end there. Vergil grimaced at the sight of what seemed to be vomit on the floor near the drum set and drumsticks stuck in the wall above it. Of course the drum set itself had been stacked in an odd fashion to resemble some kind of pyramid formation and the pool table...oh, the infamous pool table...it was in shambles. Five shambles to be exact.

 _But where are the...? Hm._

Vergil looked up to see the billiard balls stuck snugly in the ceiling. Although he tried, he could not come up with any plausible explanation for them to be up there. Even in the case of drunk people, it was hard to come up with a scenario that would end with billiard balls being stuck overhead. What did they do? Just throw them up for fun...?

Vergil's hand instinctively went to his stomach. Yeah maybe he should hold off on the phrase "throw up" for the next day or so...

Sitting on the couch, Vergil leaned his head back and closed his eyes, releasing a deep sigh.

"Good morning sunshines!" Trish sauntered down the steps with a huge smile on her face, not at all sparing any noise as she did so. Scratching a slender finger in her messy bun and straightening her pajamas, she stood at the back of the sofa and put her hands on her hips.

Neither Vergil or Dante responded in any way.

"Hey! Get up and get started on your chores, we don't have time to waste!"

"Do you _have_ to be so loud?" Dante's eyes turned and glared at the blond behind him. He got it already. He made a dumb decision and now he's gotta pay for it twofold. She didn't have to rub it in...

"Did _you guys_ have to be so destructive?" Trish was amused .

Dante rolled his eyes in a huff and stood from his seat. Surely he loved her, no doubt about it, but sometimes he didn't like her. He concluded that there were only a few things that Trish absolutely couldn't resist: cats, beetroots, and picking on him whenever she got the chance. Of course it wasn't like he spared her any ridicule when odd things happened to her either. Like that one time she was snooping around in the boxes under his desk and ended up accidentally touching her head to the underside of the desktop...where a fat wad of his gum was being stored.

She had a little bald patch for a month.

Of course, after a few times of him referring to her as "patchy" and "madame bald spot" he ended up with a black eye. Yet, he still had no regrets at busting his guts laughing at his poor wife. The only thing he regretted now, was that dumb drinking game he and Vergil played last night. His head hurt so bad at that moment, he could chew nails...wait, what?

Dante made his way to the kitchen to grab a broom and when he returned, Trish lifted an eyebrow at him. He decided to ignore it and work to get the mess cleaned up as soon as possible so he could go back to sleep. As far as he was concerned, he didn't want to talk, he didn't want to listen, he didn't want raised eyebrows. All he wanted was for everyone to leave him alone.

"Dante."

" _What_?"

A look of surprise mixed with amusement covered Trish's face, "Hey, don't get all grumpy with me mister. I didn't do any of this. I just want to let you know you need to clean up that throw up first. It's stinking up the place." Trish's face twisted into a grimace as she glanced to the offending spot. Turning on her heel she began to make her way back upstairs, "Paper towel's in the pantry."

Dante scoffed and continued to sweep before suddenly freezing. His eyes slid over to the couch and narrowed before he stomped his way over to it. Frowning, he gave one of Vergil's ears a hard flick and before he knew it, he was dodging a fist.

"Do you have a death wish?" was the cool question posed from the elder twin as he now stood inches away from his doppelganger, glaring dangerously. He had gotten off of the couch with a quickness that only Dante could have ever been prepared for. He had aimed to connect full on with Dante's jaw when he felt the sharp head pain jolt through his brain from the ear flick, but the younger had caught his fist in his hand before he could make contact.

"No. But _we_ have a mess to clean. So get up and help." Dante returned Vergil's look with a glare of his own. There was _no_ way he was going to just sit on the sofa in peace while he was left to clean up everything.

Vergil scoffed as he yanked his hand from Dante's, "Neither of us are content with these circumstances but you had better control your tantrums. Touch me again, and you'll lose that arm."

"Yeah, yeah." Dante waved his hand dismissively as he turned to refocus on sweeping, "Hey, Trish said paper towel is in the kitchen. Get that barf up over there will ya?"

"No." Vergil strode passed Dante, completely unphased by the look on his face.

"What?"

"Are you hard of hearing? I said no. You do it."

Dante was becoming indignant. Here he was, head throbbing, body aching and sweeping a floor, simply trying to get this done and Vergil was blantantly making things more difficult.

"You do realize they're gonna keep hounding us until this is done right? That means, no sleep, no peace, and no quiet until then. And you're saying you're not gonna help clean a mess that you helped ma-" Dante was beginning to raise his voice before Vergil cut in.

"I never said that, so don't put words in my mouth fool. Let me remind you that _you_ are the reason we're in this mess in the first place. And furthermore, I recall you _also_ being the one who emptied your bowels over there, not me, so you will be cleaning that up." Vergil's eyes narrowed, practically daring Dante to challenge him. With the way he was feeling at the moment, today would be the day that he'd put him through a wall if he did. He turned and began picking up things from the floor to place them back into their proper places.

"Whatever, just help." Dante swept the floor with a vengeance, "...Dante jr."

Vergil went rigid. His eyes narrowed and he turned his head slightly.

"What did you just say?" Vergil's voice lacked any emotion and he was sure he felt the blood drain from his face at the thought of what Dante had just said. He was sure he had won last night's game against him. Yes, he did...right?

"I said your name for the next week mini me."

 _No. It can't be._

Thats when the memory came flooding into his mind...

 _~o~o~o~_

"Yooooo Verge, hurry up and hit the bawl dood." Dante was laid across his desk pointing a pool stick up at the ceiling and sky writing with it, while his other arm dangled holding a bottle of scotch.

Their game of billiards had been going on for over an hour and both brothers were determined to win. Each armed with their own tactics and skill sets, they took care to play their best game and avoid minor hiccups like the plague. They both had alot riding on this game after all.

So far, they had been sinking balls back to back. Somewhat. Well, in between distractions anyway. Every time a ball was pocketed, they'd get distracted and do something completely unrelated before coming back to the game for the next turn. So far they had managed to bake some kind of bread loaf, couch dive, have a chugging contest, play indoor baseball, have a wrestling match, and have a concert with Dante on drums, Vergil on Nevan (until she started clawing to try and take off his pants), and both on vocals, all in between their turns in the game. Whether it was the effect of the alcohol, their way of trying to delay the end of the game, or a bit of both was totally up for debate.

However, although they had been pocketing the targets right and left, there was a slight problem...

It was currently Vergil's turn and there were four balls left on the table, including the eight ball. The elder's head lay awkwardly against the green felt of the table as his lip curled in concentration. He shuffled his feet slightly to maintain his balance as his feet were spread quite a distance apart. In fact, there had been a couple of moments where he had to throw himself backwards to keep from busting some kind of awkward split (much to Dante's amusement). Well...in his case, he was sure it wouldn't quite be a split he would end up busting so it was pretty much a life or death scenario...

Nevertheless, as he carefully aimed his pool stick he knew he had to deal with the odd stance in order to get the shot he wanted. Aim. Pull. Shoot.

 _*clack*_

"Fouuuul." Dante slurred as he sat upright with a grin plastered on his face.

Vergil let out a deep breath before grabbing his glass from the floor and slamming back the contents. He cleared his throat after the liquid danced like fire down his esophagus.

Dante stood up and walked over to the table, leaning on his pool stick, "Tsk. Tsk."

"What?" Vergil furrowed his brows.

"You gotta foul."

"Yeah."

Dante's grin widened, "You know what that means dontcha?"

"Give me some bread." Vergil stared at the dilapidated loaf of homemade bread that sat in a bowl on a nearby shelf.

"Noooo. Oh." Dante grabbed the bowl from the shelf and handed it to Vergil who began picking pieces from it and stuffing them into his mouth appreciatively. "What was I saying?"

Vergil shrugged, still stuffing his cheeks like a chipmunk.

"Oh." Dante reached over, taking some of the bread for himself before it being moved out of his reach when Vergil turned to block his access.

"Hey! Gimme some more! It's both ours!" Dante reached for it, but Vergil side-stepped.

"No. Ish moine."

"But I need it. You can't even put anymore in your mouth greedy!" Dante's shoulders slumped as he watched Vergil defiantly stuff more bread in his face, "Hey, say chubby bunny..."

"Shubby bunyi." Vergil nudged the bowl into Dante's chest and in turn, the younger twin gleefully took a handful and started to form it into a ball in his hands.

Once he was satisfied, Dante took the ball and sat it on the pool table, "Oh yeah! You got a foul, you know what that means?"

Vergil looked at Dante in silence as he continued chewing. Dante leaned down and hit the bread ball with his pool stick. However, instead of it launching forward, it got skewered. He lifted it and examined it for a moment before starting to eat it off the stick.

"Six fouls in a row. That was your third and I did three before you. And there's uh...one eight ball and two other ones on the table."

Vergil motioned for Dante to continue his explanation.

"Two words. Stale mate." Dante's eyes studied the table and he nodded his head in affirmation.

Swallowing the last of the bread in his mouth, Vergil looked down at the table and lifted a brow.

"Um. So. What then?" Vergil leaned on the table as he felt himself almost lose balance from his intoxication.

"We both don't win. Aw." Dante's face fell in a comical frown for a few moments before perking up, "Wanna throw the balls at the ceiling for making us lose?"

 _~o~o~o~_

 _That's right. It was a stalemate. And that means..._

"You lost as well." Vergil stared pointedly at Dante whose grin faltered and turned into a frown.

"Uh. No. I won. _You_ lost." Dante turned his back and began sweeping, "Just accept your penalty like a man, bro. Y'know, honor and all that."

"And there is no honor in lying _brother_. Last night's game was a stalemate. Which means neither of us won."

"What?"

Vergil narrowed his eyes, "And since _neither_ of us won, then what is the only other placement?"

Dante spun on his heels. There was no way this was happening right now. First the painful jaws of a hangover gets a hold of him, preceded by a lack of sleep, and now he was being presented with something much worse than the both of them combined. This couldn't be happening. He was sure he had beat Vergil in pool last night. There was no way they stalemated.

"How would you know? You were drunk as a skunk!" Dante started to feel a bit twitchy...

"As were you, but I remember, that's exactly how it ended. Take a look above your head." Vergil raised a finger towards the ceiling.

Dante's eyes shot up and as soon as his eyes met them, he remembered...

"According to you, ' _The balls made us lose_ ' so that was their fate. Remember now?"

Dante's lips slowly parted as realization hit him and his own words played back in his head like a tape recorder. He clearly remembered explaining to Vergil the outcome of their game according to the official BCA 8 ball rules that they were playing by. It was true. They had stalemated. And as a result it wasn't just Vergil who was about to have a week of agony, but...

"We both lost Dante. I'll be buying your chastity device today, _dear brother_."


	3. Chapter 3

"So what's on the agenda for you two today?"

Ari shrugged slightly as she sipped the hot coffee in her over sized mug, "Not sure. I closed a case 2 days ago and i'm waiting on a lead for a new one that came in last night." She sat her cup on the table as she began cutting into the waffle plated in front of her, "I don't think V has anything on the books either."

Trish hummed as she ate a piece of sausage from her fork before sipping from her own mug, "It's been kind of slow lately."

Ari nodded.

This was one of the things that they had all come to accept as just being an inevitable part of their profession: the occasional standstill. For the most part, none of them minded it if it was only for a week or so, maybe two, but anything beyond that and the restless stir-craziness would eventually kick in.

Ari lifted her gaze to just over Trish's shoulder from across the table, taking note of the beauty the day had brought just outside the kitchen window. The sun was shining, but not blazing and the orange leaves on the trees reminded her of the ideal fall season image seen in ads and movies. She silently debated on asking Vergil to take a stroll with her in the park later on. It just seemed like a waste to linger around the shop for a lead that may not even come that day.

Of course it would have to be after Vergil got a bit of sleep, seeing as to how he barely got any the previous night due to...shenanigans. She was glad that he and Dante had actually managed to get the office cleaned in a timely fashion though, especially since there was virtually nothing for her and Trish to redo afterward. It was a pleasant surprise really, because they had both expected to find a half-done job. Then again, they probably forced themselves to do a near perfect cleaning so they wouldn't have to hear from either of them when they did finally crash.

Ari smirked to herself. _Men._ She tilted her head slightly.

Interestingly enough though, instead of falling into bed like she had expected him to, Vergil had told her he needed to go to a shop in town to get something once the place was back in order. But he never told her _what_ he needed to get, and that made her curious. Usually when he said things like that, he would surprise her with some kind of gift not long after. Hm...

"Did you hear me?" Trish's voice startled her out of her thoughts as the blond tilted her head in curiosity.

"Huh?"

"I said how do you feel about getting out of town for the weekend? It's been a while since we vacay'd."

That sounded nice...and it definitely _had_ been a while. It was already Thursday and she doubted anything pressing would roll across the desk with it being so close to the weekend. She didn't see why not and quite frankly, she felt like it would almost be a crime to deny themselves this. Especially since the last time they had all gotten out of the city, was for a job...

 _'It would be nice to be leaving for leisure for once...'_

"Where to?" Ari set her utensils on her plate and grabbed a napkin to wipe her mouth.

Trish smirked, "Miami?"

"Trishaaa-"

"Oh c'mon! I really wanna go to that hotel I heard about on the beach. It'll be great." Her face beamed as she leaned her elbows on the table, "Listen, I heard they have these suites you can rent that have built-in stripper poles in the bedrooms. Just think about it..."

Ari lifted a brow and shook her head in disbelief as Trish rambled on.

"We could go and pick up some really cute lingerie and stuff from this one store I know...ooh! and I know a place that sells _the best_ perfume, and they have body glitter and some pretty amazing accessories too..." Trish tapped a slender finger against her temple, "They open at 7 tonight...hmm."

"Trish..." Ari crossed her arms as a blush began to creep onto her light brown cheeks.

"What about toys though...? Do you two do toys? I know another shop that me and Dante go to that we can check out if you wanna grab some. Just be mindful that they have some pretty wild stuff..."

"Trish!"

Blue eyes blinked in innocent confusion as Ari shuffled uncomfortably in her chair, crossing both her arms and legs as she stared down at nothing in particular.

Trish giggled knowingly, "Oh c'mon, it'll be fun and you know it."

They stared at each other in silence.

"Would you want to see _Vergil_ on a pole then?"

A laugh burst forth from Ari at the almost desperate look on Trish's face.

"Listen, i'm trying to check this place out, okay?" Trish waved her hand dismissively at being laughed at, but she held back a laugh herself as she reached for her coffee mug.

"So why hadn't you and Dante already gone then?" Ari tilted her head.

"Haven't had the time."

Ari hummed. She had to admit, a pole in a hotel room was definitely something she didn't see every day. And it actually did sound like an interesting idea to her... At this point, she and Vergil had done quite a few erotic things together but pole dancing was new territory. She wrinkled her nose. She would definitely have to disinfect the thing _if_ she did decide to give it a go though. Of course the image of her trying to be all seductive and then awkwardly falling off the thing ended up flashing in her mind also. Now she was feeling a bit anxious, but her curiosity was stronger still.

 _Oh boy..._

"Well...alright. I'm in." Ari couldn't help but smile at how outrageous she anticipated this to be. Regardless, they were getting ready to finally go on a long overdue road trip and for that she was thankful.

Trish clapped her hands together and squealed, "That's the spirit! This is gonna be amazing, you'll see. Oh, we have so much to do, we gotta start packing! We leave tomorrow."

"Well alright then. " Ari began as she stood from the table and stretched, "I'll go change out of my jammies and meet you in about...15?" she picked up her empty plate and cup.

"Sounds good." Trish began collecting her dishes also and walking to the sink, "And i'm thinking we should keep the detail about the room as a little secret surprise for the boys. What do you think?"

Ari nodded. This would definitely be interesting.

 _..._

Dante's arm dangled freely off the side of the over sized bed that he and Trish shared. His face was buried obscurely within his pillow, so much so that it seemed like streams of white hair were flowing out of the pillow itself. He snored with abandon as his body was finally getting the sleep it had been craving all morning.

It had been several hours since he and Vergil had finished cleaning up downstairs and once it was all said and done, he wordlessly made a beeline to his bed and flopped down on it. It didn't take him long to fall asleep, in fact, he may have even been asleep before his body made contact with the matress. Nonetheless, it was now late in the evening and he showed no signs of getting up, not even a little bit.

Soon a knock resounded throughout the room just barely startling the hunter awake. Lifting his head slowly, his eyes lazily scanned the room before he let it drop back into the pillow unceremoniously. Hearing the door slide open, he assumed it to be Trish coming to check on him and made no move to make any acknowledgment. He felt he could do for a few more hours of sleep.

 _But why would Trish knock?_ _Oh well. Who cares._

"Wake up."

 _..._

Dante remained defiantly still despite feeling something heavy drop onto the bed next to him.

 _What the...?_

"Dante."

He sighed.

"Go away." Dante brought his arms up to squeeze the pillow under his head hoping to emphasize his desire to be left alone.

It was duly ignored.

Vergil gazed down at his twin with indifference. After returning from the town center earlier, he had also opted to catch up on some sleep. He slept soundly for about 6 hours before he awoke to Ari telling him that she and Trish were going to shop around for a bit. Once they left, he decided to get up and deliver Dante's special package to him.

After everything he had endured over the passed 15 hours, he felt like it was all about to be worth the trouble. He made sure he got the most durable and memorable one he could find. Vergil still maintained that had it not been for Dante's stubborn desire to not take no for an answer, all of this could have been avoided. The drinking, the destruction, the deal that brought this about and the uncomfortable situation he ended up in when he went to get the contraption.

Vergil snarled in disgust at the thought of what unfolded a few hours ago.

* * *

 _~o~o~o~_

"Can I help you find anything sir?" The shop keeper looked like something out of a freak show.

Greasy black hair was plastered against his scalp and smoothed into a small ponytail at the back of his head. He wore a costume that made him look like some kind of sado-masochistic executioner but instead of it being the typical black, it was bright red with tassles on the shoulders.

The environment itself was relatively clean however and the lighting was soft, seductive even, with different areas being lit with different colored bulbs. Vergil rarely stepped into places like this except to grab a few handcuffs and blindfolds here or there, but he knew this was the only place in town that would carry chastity devices. He thought it to be kind of ironic actually. He had brought Ari here a couple of times in the past but eventually she opted to stay behind whenever they fancied anything from the establishment. She had begun to feel uneasy at the idea of people knowing what they used in the bedroom and found it easier to cope by just sending Vergil, who simply didn't feel any such embarrassment.

He passed by the eager shop keeper without sparing a glance, "No, I'm fine."

"Alright, just holler if you need assistance." The man returned his attention to an obscene magazine as he sat back down at the register.

Vergil took a few moments to browse around before he found the area that held what he was looking for. He was almost horrified at the vast array of devices that could undoubtedly drive a man insane. Alot of them looked quite painful and _all_ of them looked uncomfortable. He was feeling a bit merciful, so he decided against choosing a painful looking one. He merely wanted to choose one that would essentially be Dante-proof, and would get his point across to him: When I say no, I mean it.

Then he saw it.

"Need some help handsome?"

Vergil lifted a brow at the sudden interruption but did not divert his attention.

A short, petite girl suddenly stood next to him with a hand on her hip, popping a piece of gum in her mouth. Her hair was a pastel pink and pulled up into two ponytails on either side of her head. She wore a purple leather bodysuit that left nothing to imagination and the tall heels on her stilettos were so thin they almost looked non-existent.

"No, I don't."

The woman's eyes followed up to the area Vergil had been browsing and she lifted an eyebrow.

"Now what's a man like _you_ , want with something like _that_?"

Vergil was silent. His annoyance with this intruding woman was rising rapidly.

She circled around to the other side of him to get into his view better, "Surely a sexy stallion doesn't need that. I see you as more of a _wild and free_ type." her eyes flashed with flirty playfulness as she lifted a hand to lightly trace her fingers along his shoulder.

 _Foolish tramp._

Vergil turned his head to look at the woman who eyed him up and down with what he deemed was supposed to be an alluring look. A smile slithered onto his face and the woman looked intrigued.

"You know..." Vergil began in a low voice, "It's interesting that you describe me as 'wild and free'..."

"Is it?" The woman took a step forward, her excitement was apparent.

"Indeed. In fact, I'd even go as far as to assume that you describe yourself as being the same. Am I correct?" he watched her eyes flicker down to look at his left hand, noticing his wedding ring.

She crossed her arms in front of her and lifted a pinky finger to her lips, "You are, but i'm definitely more on the _wild_ side." She winked, "I could show you sometime if you want."

Vergil tilted his head slightly and spoke in a sultry voice and as he began to speak, her eyes fluttered closed as she fell for his charm, "Even if I wasn't married, I wouldn't waste my time on a desperately whore-ish creature like you."

It took a moment for the woman to realize what he had said, and when she did her face suddenly looked confused. Vergil's eyes hardened.

"And by the way, it's quite obvious that your breasts are fake and those crudely colored extensions have seen better days."

The woman looked horrified as Vergil brushed his shoulder off and grabbed what he came for, gliding passed her still form uncaringly.

The blatant disregard for sacred things and obvious boundaries that some people showed never ceased to disgust him. They behaved like animals who never came out of heat and he had no patience for them except to humiliate them for their efforts. The offense they took satisfied him greatly because, quite frankly, the cretins that approached him offended him by merely beginning to think to address him in such a manner.

He would never stoop so low as to be unfaithful to his wife, that was beneath him, but even if he was single he still wouldn't stoop so low as to be promiscuous. That was also beneath him. No matter what his status, he carried himself in a dignified and self-respecting manner and he couldn't understand why a person would choose to be otherwise. Just thinking of some of the people he had seen on the street who legitimately looked like a walking bag of STDs made him shudder.

 _~o~o~o~_

* * *

"Get up. Your package is here." Vergil nudged the box towards his twin.

Reluctantly, Dante lifted his head and turned to look at the box in question. He lifted an eyebrow before slowly rising to a sitting position. He eyed the unmarked box suspiciously before looking up at Vergil.

"What is it?"

"You know what it is. Just open it." Vergil replied with a hint of impatience.

"Uh...no I don't..." Dante began opening the box and Vergil watched in eager anticipation, despite his face lacking any indication of such excitement.

"What the..." Dante was speechless and then realization hit him. It wasn't a bad dream, this was real.

He swallowed hard as he pulled the chastity belt from the box, turning it this way and that. This couldn't be happening, he actually went and found one. Dante could feel his body start to shake at the sight of the thing, it looked beastly. He looked up at Vergil who had a smug smirk on his face and wanted to knock it right off. Did he really expect him to wear _this_ for a week?

The metal belt was fashioned in the shape of a thong. A very stiff and unforgiving thong at that. Of course the worst of it was the curved cage that sat proudly at what he knew was the front. And he knew exactly what was to go in that cage... Dante clentched his teeth, this was cruel. And all for what? A game of pool? Of all the crazy things he could get himself into, this one definitely took the cake.

"I can't fit this. Cage is too small." Dante was determined to make this difficult.

Vergil rolled his eyes, "You can, and you will."

"No I can't dude, _look_ at it." he held it up to emphasize his nil point, "How are you gonna tell me what my junk can and can't fit in?

Vergil was silent. He knew Dante was just trying to worm his way out of the deal but he was unwilling to let him do so.

"You are backing out, refusing take your punishment like a true man? I see."

Dante scoffed, "What? I'm not-"

"Then put it on."

Dante's mouth snapped shut and he glared at Vergil. No one questioned his manhood. _No one_. He would see just how much of a man _Vergil_ would be holding up his own end of the punishment. Dante stood from the bed, stepping to Vergil so close their noses almost touched and glaring into his arrogant face. Brushing passed him, he headed to the bathroom. Oh, his time was surely coming, and after seeing this torture device, he would make sure to make it one that _dearest big brother_ would remember for the rest of his life.


	4. Chapter 4

Yes, dear brother. Writhe. Writhe in your cage of torment. Serves you right after all. I know you hate me right now, but I couldn't care less. Yes, I see the way you are savagely skewering your food onto the unforgiving prongs of your fork. Probably imagining it's me...how amusing... The way he is chewing with such a vengeance as he glares bloody murder at me warms my heart.

* * *

Vergil calmly twirled his fork, amassing a spool of spaghetti noodles before bringing it to his lips. His eyes twinkled with mischief as he stared across the dining table at his mirror image. His indignant mirror image...

It hadn't been long since Dante had been secured in his device before they all gathered downstairs for dinner. It was almost comical the way Dante's face fell in defeat as he watched him lock the belt, twirling the keys on a finger in triumph. Vergil had made up in his mind that despite him having lost the bet as well, and being served an awful punishment, Dante's was so much worse.

"So...You boys sleep well?" Trish shoved a meatball into her mouth before looking up from her plate expectantly.

"Yeah." Dante's eyes never left his twin.

"Indeed." Vergil answered, wiping his mouth with a napkin. He half wondered how Dante was seemingly resisting blinking his eyes. It was rather impressive actually...

Trish nodded in acknowledgment, "That's good, that's good..." she looked over at Ari and lifted her brows.

Ari nodded slightly.

"Well...we have something we want to share with you guys." Trish continued, "Ari?"

Vergil directed his gaze to Ari as Dante continued to kill him with his eyes.

Ari set her fork down and took a sip of juice from her glass before looking at Dante, then Vergil, "We're going on a road trip tomorrow."

Vergil lifted a brow, "An out of town job came in this week?" It had been a while since they had been summoned to a mission outside of the city. And although there was a lot more to consider in terms of preparations when accepting such missions, he appreciated the change of scenery every now and then. Of course he knew he'd probably have to put up with a very ornery Dante this time due to _certain conditions_. Nonetheless, he would make the most of it. Hopefully it won't affect Dante's job performance. A deep smirk slid onto his face.

"Not this time." Ari sat her glass down onto the table and threw up dramatic jazz hands, "Guys, we're going on vacation!"

"Woo!" Trish clapped with a supplementary enthusiasm before doing a little dance in her chair.

Vergil's smirk slowly disappeared to be replaced with slightly furrowed brows.

Dante suddenly coughed, hitting the side of one of his fists to his chest before whipping his head to look at Ari and Trish, "What?!" he barely choked the word out.

"Yep, we're going to Miami! And let me tell you, it's gonna be a-ma-zing." Trish worked to capture a rolling meatball onto her fork.

"And _interesting_ too." Ari chimed in.

"Mhmm. We already booked with a rockin' hotel and there's _so_ much to see. We found out about some interesting places to shop and hang out, there's not gonna be one dull moment..."

"A vacation?" Realization began to hit Vergil as his thoughts began to drown out the voices of the chatty women. They hadn't taken a holiday for months, mainly due to time constraints and cases being called in. But this week had been oddly slow, admittedly, the ideal time to plan such a trip. These conditions didn't come often so it made sense for them to jump at the opportunity. However...this time was different. This time, he had a certain punishment looming over him.

* * *

Surely there must be another time we can postpone this to... I would much rather not go on a vacation dressed as _Dante_. Of course I suppose it will be much easier to deal with than what he has to contend with...

Heh... _much_ easier.

Although...how will I explain the sudden wardrobe change to Ari without making light of this foolish bet? It was enough to have to deal with the drunken embarrassment of last night...To have to also explain that our antics extend into another 7 days, now apparently including a vacation, would surely not turn out well...

A certain memory suddenly flooded into his mind and he began to realize exactly how problematic this would likely become.

~o~o~o~

He lifted her up with ease and felt her legs slide around his waist, walking her backwards he planted gentle kisses on her collar bone before pressing her into a wall. His breathing was deep and he could hear her sigh into his hair.

Vergil raised his head up to look up at her, his hair falling like a mop over his face. Through his downy locks he could see the desire in her eyes as she bowed her head to stare down at him, but almost immediately, she furrowed her brows slightly. He tilted his head, curious about her gaze.

Tightening her legs around his waist, Ari suddenly slid both of her arms from around his neck as he continued to balance her against the wall. She gently ran her fingers through his hair, pushing it back into its signature position before a small smile appeared on her flushed face.

Vergil lifted an eye brow.

"Um...I prefer you look like _you_ and not your brother. Especially when we're like _this_." She glanced away sheepishly and looking as if she was feeling slightly awkward.

He got her message loud and clear. He admitted that he sometimes forgot about the fact that he had an _identical_ twin. And despite their obvious differences in mannerisms and personalities, there were some moments where they could be indistinguishable based on appearance alone. He figured it must have been strange for her to see him in those brief moments where he donned a relaxed appearance, like when he stepped out of the shower, and be reminded of Dante, who donned a relaxed appearance as his default style choice. That is, when he wasn't wearing something ridiculous and seemingly highly uncomfortable.

"Understood darling." He smiled as he lifted one of his hands to run it through his hair in acknowledgment before leaning back in to plant more kisses on her.

~o~o~o~

Wait...I wonder... Will she want to...? Probably... But if I'm dressing and acting like _him_... No. This won't do. We have to reschedule this.

* * *

"Why now? Can't we just do it next weekend?" Dante's tone held a tinge of desperation and Vergil could tell he was struggling to keep his composure.

"Nope. We already booked the rooms and since we're due to arrive tomorrow, we can't cancel without giving up our deposit." Trish finished her meal and pushed her plate forward to cross her arms and rest them on the table. "Besides we need this, especially after all the chaos of work we've been putting up with this month..."

"Agreed." Ari added.

Well there goes that idea, they sounded like their minds were set. Great. Now what? Perhaps he should feign illness. No wait...it was highly unusual for him to get sick. An injury maybe? Hm. Not quite. Actually, what if a job suddenly got called in tomorrow? Yes. _Suddenly_.

"You're not excited Dante? I thought you'd be eager to flee town for a few days. No business, and _all_ pleasure _._ " Trish winked at him.

Dante shifted uncomfortably in his seat, whether from nerves or from the fact that the chastity belt was cutting into his bum was up for debate. Either way, internally, he wanted to wail. Just when he thought this couldn't get any worse...

"What of the prospect of someone calling in tomorrow?" Vergil hoped this would work, it was probably their last hope at diverting this.

"We already set up the answering machine to let them know we'll be closed this weekend. Any inquiries will be taken care of Tuesday morning." Ari replied in a rehearsed tone as she placed her napkin down onto her empty plate.

"Tuesday?" Vergil and Dante questioned almost in unison.

Trish and Ari exchanged an odd look before Trish answered, "Yep. We'll head back Monday instead of Sunday."

"Why?" Dante's voice sounded a bit strained.

" _Because_. Just trust us. We got a fun weekend planned." Ari smirked, glancing shyly at Vergil before playing with her fork.

" _Fun_?" Dante asked.

"Yep. _Fun,_ fun." Trish seemed delighted.

He caught that look. He _definitely_ caught that look. Vergil chewed at the inside of his cheek. It seemed there was no getting around this and it made his stomach feel odd. Not to mention, he began to feel angry at the fact that him being a "mini Dante" was what his egotistical twin chose as his punishment. Ari didn't deserve this. Vergil frowned.

No, he didn't like this at all. However, it wasn't because he was intimidated or anything silly like that, but simply because _he alone_ had the right to be close to her, no other man was allowed that. But here he was, being forced into behaving as and looking like another man within the closeness he and his wife shared. And _his brother_ of all people... He could feel the rage ignited within him. Vergil held his own with confidence and had no interest or reason to be a jealous man, but he was quite unapologetically possessive of what was his.

Trish clapped her hands together, standing from her seat at the table, "Well, we better get packing if we wanna get a good night's sleep. It's a bit of a drive to make." She began to gather her dishes. Ari followed suit as they both disappeared into the kitchen.

Dante's eyes instantly shot to Vergil once the women were out of sight. The glare was nothing shy of the stares of 1000 angry, ready-to-charge bulls. "If I die this weekend, it's all your fault."

"If I lose my sanity, it's all _your_ fault." Vergil met his glare with one of his own as they challenged each other silently.

"Of course, the one weekend where... and Miami too...?" Dante whimpered pathetically before refocusing on his brother, "I can't stand you."

"Shut up, the feeling is mutual. And let me remind you _dear brother_ , this is all _your_ fault." Vergil snapped as he rubbed at his temples.

" _My_ fault?" Dante's eyes narrowed, "The only thing that _I'm_ guilty of is wanting to hang out with my jerk of a brother. This is _your_ fault."

Vergil scoffed, "Perhaps you should learn to take _no_ for an answer and stop trying to force your selfish way all the time. If you think this is my doing, you need to be checked in to the nearest asylum."

Dante grumbled colorfully as he stood from his seat pawing at the back of his pants. Vergil watched him and smirked knowingly. He stifled a laugh as Dante continued his personal groping, moving from the back to the front of his trousers. After a few moments, Dante seemed to settle down, either having given up or finally getting into a somewhat comfortable alignment with his new companion.

"I'll have your clothes for the weekend ready for you in a few Dante jr." Dante growled at the elder. He paused, staring pointedly, "And you need to stop talking like that. That's not how _we_ talk."

Vergil's smirk disappeared and he briefly glared up at Dante as he brushed passed him to go up the stairs. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, not at all looking forward to what he was going to actually be doing.

 _Is this real life?_

His eyes suddenly flew open and his hands instinctively reached up to the arms that gently wrapped themselves around his neck from behind him. He shivered and hissed as a warm tongue flicked out to capture his earlobe before her lips mumbled against his cheek.

"Make sure you pack your silk robe. The sexy black one. Don't forget." Ari whispered before kissing his cheek and turning to go up the stairs.

Vergil swallowed thickly, closing his parted lips.

 _Sweet mother of..._

What was he going to do? He groaned in frustration as he stood from his chair. Picking up his plate and utensils, he suddenly had the strange feeling of impending doom. He shook his head. He _had_ to find a way around this. For he feared that if he didn't, there would be quite a hefty price to pay. He briefly glanced down. A hefty price indeed.

...

His grin rivaled that of the Cheshire cat himself as he marveled at his work. It was so beautiful, it almost brought a tear to his eye. It would kind of be like having his own kid for the next week; maybe they could even play catch or something to mark the occasion. Regardless, he was giddy beyond all reason. But there was one more thing that needed to be done to make it perfect. Well, almost.

"Stop scowling, I don't scowl DJ." Dante's tone was filled with playfulness as he met Verg-... _Dante jr.'s_ gaze in the mirror, "Now say it."

Vergil's glare intensified and his fists were balled up so tightly at his sides, his knuckles were white.

" _Say_ it." Dante narrowed his eyes, "Or you can admit this is too much for you, we call it even and drop this entire thing."

Vergil clenched his teeth, "No."

"Then say it." Dante crossed his arms.

Vergil huffed and dropped his shoulders, "Hey...what's goin' on babes...? I'm DJ and..."

"And?"

"Shut up, i'm trying. _And_...I'm ready to party. Hard."

Dante eyes teared up as he choked back a laugh, "Not bad, needs some work though. But good try." He ruffled Vergil's hair before his hand was savagely smacked away.

"Just make sure you greet them just like that. I'll take care of the rest." Dante turned to leave the bathroom, "And don't forget your bag of clothes. I put 'em on your bed. Got it?"

Vergil was silent.

" _Got it_?" He was enjoying this so much.

"Yeah...dude."

Dante smiled wide before exiting the bathroom to return to his room. He knew Vergil was squirming and it satisfied his vengance ten-fold. _That's what he gets for making me wear this thing._ His smile slowly faded. He really had to go an entire week _plus_ a vacation without be able to... Suddenly his stomach felt sour, he had a very strong feeling Trish had some sexy stuff planned for him...

Dante looked to the bags that sat atop their bed. With that in mind, he knew it was only a matter of time before Trish found out about it. He had expertly avoided any chance of her finding out when they went to bed last night by claiming tiredness and carefully placing a few pillows, but he couldn't keep doing that without looking suspiscious. _But maybe she won't be mad._ Of course, if there was a way around this he would make it his business to find it. What exactly were his options though? There didn't seem to be much to choose from, but he refused to let that stop him. He would do everything in his power to survive this week without her finding out and once it was over, never _ever_ bet like that again. He could hear voices downstairs.

 _It must be time to..._

"Let's load up boys!" Trish's voice carried loud and clear.

Dante groaned. _Here we go..._

He grabbed his bags and left the room to start down the stairs. Glancing out the window, he saw that the sun still hadn't completely risen. It was quite early and the girls made it very clear they wanted to leave as early as possible to beat any morning traffic and get on the road. Of course they also had to stop to pick up breakfast, but that wouldn't be until they were on the outskirts of town.

Reaching the bottom step, he made his way to the couch. Ari and Trish stood by the front door with luggage of their own, looking up from a map when he sat down .

"Where's Vergil?" Trish's brows furrowed behind her shades.

"Who?" Dante said under his breath with a smirk.

Ari and Trish's attention was suddenly occupied as Vergil made his way down the stairs. Heavy black combat boots rumbled each step as he descended. His hair lay down all the way around his head obscuring his eyes and the tight black shirt he wore was buttoned only half way, generously revealing his chest and the amulet that dangled freely around his neck. His shirt was neatly tucked into his deep red leather pants that came fully equipped with belts that loosely crossed around his waist this way and that.

Ari took off her shades with her jaw dropped and Trish slowly raised a hand to cover her mouth at the sight of him.

Vergil stopped as he descended the final step and turned towards the three. Dante glanced at him over his shoulder and smirked, discreetly giving him a look that said 'Well?'

"Hey, what's goin' on babes? I'm DJ and i'm ready to party hard." Vergil's tone surprisingly sounded convincing.

Dante shook with internal laughter, being careful to hide his reaction from Trish and Ari.

"V..Ver-gil?" Ari was flabbergasted.

"No babe, I'm DJ."

Trish snapped her gaze to Dante and narrowed her eyes.

"D-DJ?! Who the...? Vergil, what are you doing?!" Ari could not compute what was going on as she stared in horror at the man that was once her husband.

"What do you mean? I'm just hangin' sweetness."

Ari shook her head in disbelief. Who was this imposter?

"What on Earth is going on here?" Trish took a step towards Dante as he stood from the couch and clapped.

"Wow, lookin' good bro." He looked down at the petite blond, "We decided to plan a little something in honor of the trip. It's all a part of that. It's a...surprise though." He hoped he was convincing enough.

"Well sur-friken-prise." Ari's tone lacked any emotion as she continued to stare at Vergil.

Trish gave Dante a look that clearly said, 'I don't believe you' and turned on her heel in a huff, "We'll talk about this in the car. We gotta go." Making her way to the door, she grabbed, still stunned, Ari by the arm to walk out to the car.

That would have to do for now. He needed some time to think of a good cover-up for this, maybe by the time they got to Miami he would have a believable story. He had to admit though, Vergil had done that pretty well. Once Trish and Ari left out the door however, Dante burst out in laughter at the awkwardly good mini-me, "C'mon dude, let's roll." he grinned.

Vergil's lips thinned into a line as his twin walked over and slapped him on his back. Quickly tipping his foot out as Dante walked away, he caught one of his ankles causing him to unceremoniously tumble into a faceplant like a sack of potatoes. He calmly stepped over Dante the potato as he followed the women out the door.


	5. Chapter 5

"Okay, we're good!" Dante slammed the trunk of the black sedan before walking around to open the front passenger door; Sliding in, he closed it with a thud as Trish gave him a slightly critical eye.

"And you're sure you brought everything you need?"

Dante waved dismissively, "Yeah babe, we're ready to rock and roll."

Trish raised a brow; She hoped Dante had not been hasty in double-checking. She knew he had a tendency to sometimes overlook minor things that, in the end, would cause a major inconvenience. She shuddered as she recalled a time when they left town for business and Dante forgot his...shampoo.

Now, normally this wouldn't be a big deal; Forget your shampoo, simply buy another one from a local shop right? Except Dante couldn't use just _any_ shampoo; In fact he couldn't use most, if any, commercial shampoos so they had to periodically make bottles of the stuff themselves. Aside from his odd hair color to begin with, they surmised it just had to be something in his genetic make-up that triggered a strange reaction to any shampoo that was not specially made to exclude most chemicals found in the majority of them.

After many experiments gone wrong and several failures to try to identify what specific chemicals he reacted to, they concluded that his head needed only the absolute basics. Considering all of the gunk that could get into his hair when on a job and cause him no issue, this was quite the mystery but they had no choice but to accept it.

Trish stared silently at Dante a little longer as he gazed back at her expectantly.

He was scratching like a madman for two weeks. His scalp had turned red with irritation and his tresses were bone dry after he tried using the 15 dollar shampoo he had bought on that trip. It had taken extremely careful and delicate pampering, thanks to her, to get his hair re-hydrated and his scalp back to normal...

"What?" Dante questioned, raising a brow.

"Shampoo?" she had to know.

"Yeah, yeah, I got it babe." Dante shook his head, no doubt catching on to what was on her mind, "I looked in the bag before I put it in the back."

"Okay." Trish sighed, glancing into the rear view mirror, "You two settled in back there?"

"Yep, all good." Ari carefully peeled open a folded road map while giving Trish a nod.

"Wait, we're not using the GPS?" Dante had turned in his seat to look back when he heard the sound of shuffling paper.

"Only if we get hopelessly lost." Ari smirked and Dante furrowed his brows. "We figured it will be more fun to navigate the old-fashioned way. Plus, it's good to know how to not depend on tech all the time." Her voice trailed as her eyes scanned the paper.

Dante took a deep breath and glanced at Vergil who was staring out the window, "You hear that? We're probably gonna end up in the woods or somethin' man. Like those people from that movie...uh..." He snapped his fingers in thought, "Wrong Turn! Remember that?"

Trish and Ari shook their heads.

"Whatever." Ari circled something on the map as Dante turned to face forward in his seat again.

"I'm just sayin', don't take any detours, stick to the scenic routes."

"Blah, blah, blah." Ari sing-songed.

"So...first stop, breakfast. Where are we going?" Trish slid on her sunglasses and turned the key in the ignition.

"I don't care, just as long as they have hash browns or those little tots." Dante began unfolding a blanket he pulled from his duffel bag.

* * *

He could hear them chattering away about food, but that was the last thing on his mind at the moment. Vergil had been silently gazing out the window at nothing in particular since he got in the car, wrecking his brains trying to figure out what he was going to do about his current dilemma. Just based off of the way she reacted to him, he had no doubt in his mind that his appearance would cause major issues; He knew it was only a matter of time before he really began to feel the heat from it.

He idly ran his tongue over one of his canines.

There had to be some way he could remedy this without breaking the agreement and letting Dante get any kind of one-up on him, he just had to think. Knowing Dante and his competitive nature whenever it came to him, it was possible that there was a loophole that he overlooked in selecting this punishment when they made the deal.

 _But what is it...? He said I had to dress like him, talk like him and act like him..._

Vergil shuddered. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes.

 _Dress...talk...act...dress...talk...act...Why would he want anyone to..._

Vergil's eyes slowly opened as an idea began to formulate in his mind.

Surely when Dante came up with the idea, he was doing it to get under his skin. He knows that the differences between them are like night and day, so he undoubtedly he felt that the inevitable discomfort it would cause Vergil would be entertaining. Not only that, but it would be a major stroke to his ego to have his older brother imitating him.

 _But there is one thing he forgot to consider in his haste to annoy me..._

A smile slid onto Vergil's face as he cut his eyes to the back of Dante's head before refocusing out the window.

 _For a week, my foolish little brother...no identity theft needed to operate under your name and image._ _You have freely given me your permission._

The fatal flaw. Suddenly Vergil began to feel a little better. He would still need to figure out what he would do in his dealings with his wife, but he at least had a way to make Dante regret his choice...and possibly even cave in. He still had to be strategic about this though, they were twins after all...

"Vergil!"

Vergil blinked twice before coming out of his thoughts and turning to look at Ari who was gazing at him with a concerned look, taking note that Dante and Trish had turned to gaze at him also.

"I told you, you gotta call him DJ, Ari. 'Vergil' won't work this weekend." Dante had a smug smirk on his face.

Ari frowned and waved dismissively, "Vergil, are you okay?"

"I am, darling..."

Dante coughed and cleared his throat, gazing at Vergil from under his hair.

Vergil retained his composure, "What's going on?"

"We were trying to decide on where to go for breakfast. Got a taste for anything?" Ari reached over and tenderly pushed his hair back from his face.

Vergil began to feel a knot forming in his core; He knew why she was doing that. "Not really. I'm cool with wherever."

Ari twisted her mouth, and Vergil could see the concern still swirling in her eyes. The more he saw her like this, the more he began to think of ways to carry out his retribution against his twin.

"So...Coco Diner then? " Trish looked around at everyone as they agreed. "Well alright, we're off!"

As the car began to roll, Vergil made up in his mind that he would begin to set his plans into motion as soon as possible. There was no need to drag it out, the sooner the better. He could see Dante staring at him through the rear view mirror and shook his head to make his hair fall back over his face. Dante nodded and looked away.

 _You have no idea what you have done. Soon you'll be begging me to shed your persona, my naive sibling..._

* * *

Ari's stare was blank, not at all reflective of what was going on internally. So many thoughts were floating through her mind, but none of them were helpful in the slightest in her quest to decipher what was happening. Her gaze lingered on him for a moment before sliding over to the bystanders who gawked as they closed the car doors and turned to make their way towards the diner.

Her eyes narrowed and her upper lip hitched as she watched the red head bat her eyelashes and flip her hair as he passed by...

"The curse of being the wife of a son of Sparda. Just try not to look too hard or you might be ready to rip some hair out. Trust me." Trish's tone was light but the venom didn't slip by unnoticed.

Ari acknowledged her with a quick glance as she stood beside her, staring at the same group of girls loitering next to a van in the parking lot.

"What is going on Trish?"

"I don't know what they're up to either girlie." she shook her head.

Ari's shoulders slumped a little, "I know one thing, it had better be absolutely phenomenal."

"Oh c'mon, you don't like the whole 'punk rocker' look on Verg?" Trish smirked and nudged Ari's shoulder, "Oh, my bad, I meant _DJ_."

Ari swatted at her but missed as she leaned out of reach with a quiet giggle, "Please don't encourage this." She looked up as Vergil and Dante approached where they waited.

Glancing over his shoulder, she turned and slid her hand in Vergil's back pocket as his arm slid around her waist. Throwing a smirk over her shoulder, she could see the red head still staring in their direction as they walked into the diner.

She didn't realize exactly how hungry she was until the mixture of delightful smells coming from the open kitchen behind the counter flooded into her nostrils. The atmosphere was pretty retro and she appreciated the simplicity of the decor. The wood paneled walls were mostly bare, save for a few windows with fake plants sitting in the sills. Although not many, the brown square tables seemed to be in pretty good condition despite their worn appearance and the black leather on the booth style seating seemed to be freshly cleaned. There weren't many people in the place at the moment, but judging by the cars pulling in outside, that would soon be a thing of the past.

Ari gazed up at the menu hanging above their heads and was thoughtful for a few moments before looking at Vergil standing next to her. She glanced away awkwardly as he caught her stare and slowly slid her hand from his pocket, to tap a slender finger to her lips.

 _It's scary how much he looks like Dante..._

Looking back up, she noticed Vergil look down briefly before crossing his arms and staring up at the menu again. Ari suddenly felt a wave of sadness wash over her at the look she caught in his eyes. She didn't want to make him feel bad about whatever surprise they had planned. But on the other hand, she didn't understand why he had to behave so differently, or, to put it plainly, why it seemed like he was acting like Dante in order to pull it off. Whatever it was.

 _What kind of thing are they planning and for how long?_

Ari could hear the waiter extend a greeting and Vergil giving his order soon after.

She wanted to give it a chance but she admitted to herself that it was quite difficult for her to deal with this sudden _makeover_. She glanced at him again, silently shuddering at how quickly the younger twin crept into her mind despite her ernest attempt to keep seeing the elder before her. She wanted her Vergil back.

She saw him toss a big bill on the counter and tell the waiter to pay for her order also before turning to walk across the diner. With furrowed brows, she watched him curiously until he walked into the small foyer where the restrooms were and sadly refocused on deciding what to order.

* * *

He all but pounded his fists into the counter as he leaned onto it, gazing at his reflection. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath as his shoulders fell slightly. He began to have doubts about his ability to survive the next few days. The sting of rejection that he felt as she moved away from him made him feel extremely uncomfortable and part of him didn't know how to handle it; He needed to get away for a moment.

His eyes opened slowly as the door behind him flew open, a blur rushing into one of the stalls. He could hear the man's feet shuffling wildly and what almost sounded like an intense struggle. The man let out a deep growl as the stall door flew open and he stomped out.

"I need the key."

Vergil lifted a silver brow.

"C'mon man, I gotta take a whiz. Please?"

"You don't need it." His tone was calm but a bit condescending.

Dante pursed his lips and Vergil could tell he was getting impatient. As much as he would have loved a sparring session at that moment, he knew it wasn't the time or the place. Not yet at least...

"On the front and the back, you will find two spring-loaded pins," Vergil began cooly, his eyes not wavering once, "press the pins located on the sides and small hatches will pop open to allow what you need."

Dante's eyes glazed over, "And how exactly am I supposed to hold my..."

"You'd better position yourself strategically because I will not release you until the week is up." Vergil stood to his full height before turning to come nose to nose with his twin, "Unless you're ready to call everything off..."

They silently challenged each other with hard stares, neither one showing any signs of backing down. Vergil could see the tension in Dante's jaw and smirked inwardly. Dante suddenly turned on his heel and walked back into the stall, slamming the door so hard the mirror shook.

Vergil strode out of the bathroom, a triumphant smirk on his face as he enjoyed a silent victory.

* * *

Surely he must be realizing that there is no escape besides admitting defeat. Did he truly expect me to purchase a device that would require me to free him every time he needs to relieve himself? Laughable. I thought your punishment through and planned it to a tee, little brother, and there is no way for you to get around it. I doubt he even needs to truly use the restroom...

What's this? It seems the women are no longer at the counter. Have they gotten the food and returned to the car already? ...It would seem so. Well that was fast.

...Hm? Who is this cretin? Out of my way.

"U-um...excuse me?"

The ginger girl from outside earlier. What does she want? I hope she isn't trying to...

"Not to be weird or anything..."

Too late. You are.

"But me and my friends noticed that you look kind of familiar. Are you in a band?"

This dreadful wardrobe...surely if I was, I would not choose anything as tasteless as this. And furthermore, i'm not interested in being bothered by any of you testosterone radars. You're not truly interested in knowing if I am in a band, you're interested in knowing if you can have what's in my...

Wait...

Actually...I am in a band. Yes, of course.

* * *

Vergil tiltled his head slightly at the red-haired woman in front of him, blue eyes peeking from under his hair. He gave a charming smile, taking note of the group who was with her standing far off across the diner, gazing expectantly in their direction.

"Yeah. Yeah I am." he answered smoothly and could see her eyes light up.

"I knew it! You're Max. Max Torrum, the lead singer from Howler Moon?" she squealed.

Vergil wanted to roll his eyes at the obnoxious name. He knew who she was talking about, only because Dante blasted their music on the jukebox back home occasionally. What an insult. They weren't even that good. The lead singer was some try hard who very obviously didn't care about degrading himself for fame; not to mention, he desperately needed someone to show him how to do scream-o properly...

 _Wait...I digress._

"Nah, I'm not him. Sorry."

"Oh...but you seem so familiar. What's your name? What's your band called?" she seemed to be desperately trying to make conversation with him.

"Band of Thieves."

"Band of Thieves?" the red head echoed in thought, "I havent heard of you guys. But i'd love to come see you play sometime?" she twirled a finger in her hair, looking into his eyes with what he assumed was supposed to be a flirty gaze.

Vergil wanted to sneer but knew he had to keep his composure, so he supressed the urge.

"Oh, we don't play. We steal."

"Huh?" she blinked twice.

"We steal stuff; In fact, we just robbed a place last week. We're a band of thieves, that's what we do." he began to head towards the door, leaving the red head with a slight look of horror on her face.

Looking back over his shoulder, he started to walk out the door, "And the name's Dante. Don't forget it."


	6. Chapter 6

And thus the unforgiving cogs of your gradual descent into madness begin to turn. Slowly but surely Dante, I will make sure this is something you will never forget. Perhaps you may even tell it to your children and your children's children...

But of course, that is the only silver lining in this entire would have thought a simple change in wardrobe would cause so much...friction. I am not used to these kinds of emotional responses.

Well...I suppose it's not exactly fair to call this a _simple_ change in wardrobe. But apart from the aesthetics, this shirt is quite constricting and these pants are rubbing me in all of the wrong ways. How is Dante able to function properly in this dreadful attire? Much less simply sit down comfortably...

* * *

As Vergil began to approach the car, Ari and Trish had already gotten inside and seemed to be pulling things from the bags. As a gentle breeze blew across the parking lot, he caught a whiff of the food and realized in that moment how hungry he really was. Approaching the car he opened the door, noticing a quick glance from Trish but Ari's eyes remained fixed in front of her as she separated the contents of the bags.

His gaze lingered on her, wondering what was going through her mind. A strange feeling came over him as he noticed her nibbling on her bottom lip; Something he recognized she did when she was feeling anxious. He closed the car door and snapped on his seat belt before bringing an arm to rest behind them on the top of the seat cushion; She still had not looked up and his concern only continued to grow in intensity.

He suddenly felt guilty. She had no part in any of the deal that had been between him and his brother and yet she was an indirect victim of the consequences. That most certainly was not fair to her and he wished he had not let his pride get the better of him. He wanted nothing more at that moment than to desperately to make it better in any way that he could.

 _I'm so sorr-_

"We eatin' in the car?" Dante's tone was jovial despite the harsh attitude he displayed in the restroom only mere moments ago.

Trish handed him a few napkins and a straw, "Yep. Unless you want to eat in an over-packed restaurant." She jerked her head in the direction of a large party bus that had just pulled into the lot, letting out what seemed like nothing less than 20 people.

"Nah I'm good, car's fine." He grabbed the sandwich she handed him, quickly abandoning it to his lap as he reached for the large cup of tater tots she gave him afterward. He wasted no time shoving a hefty handful of them into his mouth, "Is this mine too?" He pointed to a large cup that sat on the dashboard.

"Yeah." Trish replied before turning to look back at Ari, "Hey do you have the jelly in your bag?"

Ari answered with pulling out a handful of jelly packets and holding them up to her. Trish picked a few and handed them to Dante before grabbing some for herself, "Thanks girlie."

"No problem."

Vergil waited expectantly, anxiously even, for her to direct her attention to him. He needed to reassure her and there was only one way he could do that at the moment. Sure, it wasn't his preferred method, but leaving things as they were currently was not an option. He knew she and him had developed such a closeness over the course of time that they could speak with a mere look.

It was something that intrigued him, given the way he had always had a strict control over what he revealed to others about himself. He had let those walls down the moment he married her but just enough for her to step over into his world, only to raise them back up to continue to keep everyone else out. It had been new territory, but he found that once she was in, they had developed some intimate ways of knowing one another without needing to speak a mumbling word. He was startled out of his thoughts when she reached to give him what he had ordered. Taking it gently, his eyes didn't waver once; He only needed her to look at him for a few seconds...just a few.

"Here's some napkins, and the drink on the left is yours." She pointed to the cups in the holder that separated them before settling into her seat.

"Thanks." He replied lamely, deeply troubled as his thoughts began to accuse him again.

 _She won't even look at me..._

...

The drive had been long but didn't take the amount of time they initially thought it would. What made it long for Vergil in particular was the silence and awkward moments that occurred between he and Ari. He had told Trish to pull over to the side of the road about 15 times just for him to drag Dante out of the car and beat him senseless, letting all of his frustration out with every punch and roundhouse kick he landed.

Well, in his mind anyway...not as satisfying, but it did help a little.

Trish and Ari had blasted various play lists for the entire trip, singing along seemingly without a care in the world. Dante had joined in every once in a while too, that is when he wasn't silently gazing out the window; Vergil was sure that during those moments he too was thinking of their current dilemma. How could he not? A constant reminder was, no doubt, cutting into places that a man just shouldn't be cut. Not that there is _any_ place a man should be cut to begin with of course, but you get the point.

He himself had resolved to gaze at the passing sights as he leaned against the car door, holding a finger to his temple. He had even began to fall asleep after a while but when he suddenly felt them rock over a speed bump, Vergil raised a curious brow as the car turned into a lively looking round-about.

The place was lit up like one of those movie premieres he had seen on television. The neon pink lights on the massive sign contrasted with the dark colored stone of the building and the red carpet that led up to gold-colored doors looked as if it had just been freshly rolled out. The buildings weren't all that wide, but were quite tall; Not quite skyscraper status, but a generous height for hotels on city strip. All of the other buildings on the road seemed to match the overall theme: Flashing lights, valets, expensive looking stone and metal accents and massive, illuminated fountains and palm trees.

 _What kind of hotel is this...?_

* * *

This place looks...interesting. And my suspicions of at least part of the purpose of this trip are staring to come into focus. Albeit still hazy, but perhaps that is a result of me just not wanting to believe it. Had this been under normal circumstances, I would be a bit more...no... _a lot_ more...how can I say this... _eager_ to dive in to the festivities. But alas, _normal_ is completely on holiday for the next week...

Hm. It seems Dante is starting to realize something as well, just judging by the look on his face. Are my eyes playing tricks on me, or does it seem like his face just lost color?

This is a living nightmare. Of course, perhaps there is a way for me to survive this and still manage to enjoy myself. I have a shred of hope that I can find a way around this that won't compromise the deal _and_ , most importantly, not further offend Ari. I just need a little more time to think...

But Dante, I do not feel sorry for you in the slightest. If my suspicions are correct, you will be missing out on what your wife is probably planning to be the highlight of the entire trip. When will you learn to simply respect your elders? You could have avoided this altogether. Must you really learn things the hard way?

* * *

Ari and Trish stepped out of the car taking in all that the scenery had to offer. Their faces beamed as they immediately headed to the trunk to grab their luggage.

"Dante," Trish threw a duffel over her shoulder, leaning over to catch a glimpse of him in the side mirror, "go grab one of those luggage carts please!"

Dante didn't budge; In fact, he hadn't even unbuckled his seat belt. He blinked a couple of times before looking up at the rear view mirror to stare silently at Vergil who remained motionless in the backseat. Feeling his gaze, Vergil tore his attention from pondering their surroundings to stare back at him.

"We need to move. If we linger any longer, they may get suspicious again." He really wasn't in the mood to talk right now, the time to think of what he needed to do next was of the essence.

Dante remained silent for a few more moments before his voice cut through the silence "Do you realize where we are?"

"This is the _hotel_ Dante." Vergil's condescending tone did not go unnoticed as Dante's eyes hardened.

"I know that _DJ_." Now it was Vergil's turn to harden his glare. "But don't you know _what_ hotel this is?"

"Enlighten me." Dante didn't have many more times to test his patience like that.

"This is Cabana Lane hotel; Trish mentioned this place to me a couple times before. Never got a chance to actually stay here. Until now apparently." Dante let out a deep breath, visibly deflating, grimacing and shifting in his seat a bit before returning his gaze to Vergil.

"And your point is...?" Vergil motioned for Dante to explain.

Dante looked annoyed, "There's bars, dance floors, and stripper poles in the rooms."

Vergil leaned his head back against the headrest as realization began to hit him. After a few moments of silence, he started to laugh; first slowly, then a little more hysterically.

Dante's hard look suddenly went flaccid and an odd one took its place. He started to feel uncomfortable at his twin's sudden shift in demeanor.

"What's so funny? You _do_ realize what this means right?"

Vergil began to calm himself before staring down his nose at his naive younger sibling, "I want to maim you right now Dante, in the worst possible way. But the only thing stopping me is the presence of those two women back there." He began to laugh again.

Dante was offended. "You know what Vergil, the fact that you think you have cause to be angry at _me_ is completely stupid! Last I checked, _you_ aren't the one wearing this metal dick destroyer while staying in a hotel with a _stripper pole_ in it!"

Vergil immediately ceased his laughter, leaning forward to come face to face with his brother and glaring bloody murder, "You insolent pest, let me remind you for the last time, had you left me alone when I wanted to be left alone these circumstances would not even exist. Are you forgetting that I am being forced to be a complete poser? Not to mention the fact that these accursed pants i'm wearing are squeezing the life out of my testicles!"

Dante's jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed dangerously, "Well I guess that'll make two sets that won't get any play then, huh?"

It was in that moment that Vergil began to wonder if perhaps Dante _had_ actually put more thought into his punishment when he voiced it that day. Vergil's fury began to boil over at the thought of Dante intentionally choosing a condition that would directly affect he and his wife's intimacy. In fact, now that he thought about it, why didn't he just tell him to simply dress in a certain style and take on a certain personality? Why did he specifically tell him he would have to act like _him_?

Vergil began to question everything now and with every question came an even greater urge to simply beat him down with no remorse. His leg twitched.

"Was that your plan all along?" Vergil asked in a slow, dangerous tone as he discreetly flexed his fingers.

"So what if it was? It's obvious that was _your_ intention towards me. Besides, you'd better be glad you get to be a mini-me of one of the smoothest guys alive. I'm sure you'll still get play while i'm suffering. Maybe even more."

That was no compliment, it was direct provocation and Vergil confirmed his suspicions of Dante's intentions as he watched a smug grin appear on his brother's face.

Vergil's upper lip hitched slightly, "She won't even look at me while I'm dressed like this. You see, my Ari knows _her_ husband. I'm sure you saw that disgusted look she gave me when I walked down stairs this morning. I suggest you watch your mouth, or you'll be playing 32 pick-up..."

"I'd _love_ to see you try that. " Dante's grin shifted into a snarl.

"Test me again, and you will. Witnesses or not."

"We'll see."

"Yeah, you will."

"Dante! What are you guys doing? We need to get a cart so we can check in." Trish had opened the driver's side door and poked her head in, giving them both a strange look.

"We'll be right there, we were just...talking about the surprise we planned. Don't wanna spoil it y'know." Dante smirked.

"Okay, well you guys can finish that once we're settled in. We're holding up the line and I still gotta go park."

"Alright, we're right behind you."

Trish closed the door and disappeared to the back of the car again. Once she was gone Dante sighed, shaking his head slightly. He returned his attention to Vergil, who only glared. The tension that lingered was ridiculously thick and as they silently challenged each other, it was obvious that the war was far from over. Vergil had a sneaking suspicion that Dante had something else up his sleeve, but he didn't care; He had some things up his sleeve as well. The first step had already been set into motion and part two was not far behind...

"Well, we better get going." Dante began to unbuckle himself and stopped to look at Vergil when he didn't see him doing the same. He had a look of confusion marring his features for a few moments before it turned into a more understanding expression, "Look Verge as much as we both are suffering, we gotta at least _try_ to get through this without incident. Fighting won't get us anywhere except exposed and if that happens they'll probably have both our heads."

 _Without incident? Sure. I doubt that's truly your goal._ "It's not that."

Dante raised a brow and looked at Vergil strangely, "What is it then?"

Vergil looked slightly uncomfortable for a moment before speaking in a low voice, "These pants ripped when I sat down after that last restroom break..."

There were a few beats of silence before Dante burst into laughter, tears appearing in the corners of his eyes. Vergil could feel his face getting warm as Dante continued, whether from anger or embarrassment was up for debate. He felt a bit more at ease when Dante began to calm down though.

"Can't help ya. I'd offer my jacket to tie around, but it's in my duffel. Just grab some luggage and hold it behind you or somethin'." Dante wiped the tears from his eyes, "At least you don't have a contraption bulging through your pants. I caught someone looking weirdly at my crotch when we stopped at that last gas station, it was just awkward."

Vergil scoffed, half-holding back a smile and shaking his head. He began to unbuckle his seat belt; it was time to get on with whatever was going to unfold. Delaying it any further, would not make it go away in the slightest. One goal he was sure they they had in common though, was to survive the weekend without facing the wrath of a certain couple of women. _That_ was truly their biggest threat and in the grand scheme of things their rivalry paled in comparison.

...

Dante rolled the cart behind the group as they stepped through the doors of the lavish hotel. The black tile floors shined like Onyx. The soft lighting set a certain mood that was wild and cozy all at the same time. The heavy drapes were a deep purple, pleasantly matching the various, centerpieces that sat atop strategically placed end tables. The lobby area was bustling with some people socializing near a large television screen that hung on the wall and others who hooped and hollered at a bar directly across from it. A few people even lounged on the various couches placed throughout the area, scrolling away on their smart phones.

Vergil noticed a man who looked like a bouncer standing near a curtained doorway as a patron was given permission to enter. He could briefly see lights strobing in the mysterious room before the curtain dropped to obscure his vision once again. A very unorthodox sight for a hotel, but if this place was indeed the way that Dante described it, he was sure that would not be the only strange thing he'd see this weekend.

Walking towards the counter, Dante parked the cart as they waited behind the person being checked in at that moment. Vergil had taken Dante's advice to carry a piece of luggage behind him to hide the rip that would undoubtedly display his briefs to the general public, so he maintained his position without shifting around too much as Trish and Ari chatted away about the sights.

He predicted that the true challenge would begin once they got to their rooms. It would be the first time Ari and Vergil would be alone together since the start of this trip and he wondered what she would say to him first. Not only that, but what of his charade? He had to honor it, but the potential risks involved were what concerned him most. This was the first time in quite a while they had all gotten out of their city for a vacation and what he and Dante had going on, threatened to completely ruin it. Not just for them, but for their unsuspecting wives who had nothing to do with any of it as well. On the outside Vergil seemed composed, but on the inside he was falling apart.

 _How will this play out?_

He could only hope that he could come up with something that would alleviate _at least_ his dilemma, even if for only a fraction of a bit. The idea of spoiling this outing for Ari made him feel ill. He glanced over at where she stood; She had been so stand-offish it was driving him mad, but could he blame her? No, absolutely not.

"Yo DJ!"

Vergil wanted to cringe. He hated that name, he really did, "What?"

"I was thinkin', before we head up to our rooms maybe we can check out that _one thing_ we were talking about earlier." Dante gave him a look.

He had no idea what Dante was referring to, but perhaps this was his way of stalling. Or maybe he had come up with some kind of explanation that would deter any further suspicion as to what was really going on. Of course, there was always the prospect that it was something completely off the wall and would be of no help except to add fuel to the fire. He couldn't know for sure which it was, but at this point almost anything was worth considering.

"Sure bro, no prob." It was beginning to frighten Vergil how well he was playing this part.

"Okay, here's your key Mr. Ban. Your room number is 91. Just head right down there and take the elevator to the fifth floor." The clerk handed the man a key and pointed to her left. The man thanked her before walking past Dante and Vergil, smiling and giving them a slight nod while pushing a cart piled with luggage.

"Looks like he's gonna have a good time." Dante said lowly.

Vergil scoffed.

Ari and Trish walked up to the counter to get checked in as Dante and Vergil waited anxiously. More patrons began to walk in to wait their turn in line while others began to sit down in the lobby; It seemed people from all walks of life visited this place. He even saw a police officer come in and join the groups of people who had been watching a football game on the television. Vergil noticed Dante's foot tapping, something he did when he was feeling an adrenaline rush. He couldn't blame him though as he watched the clerk hand the women each a key.

"Alright, let's get this party started!" Trish exclaimed waving her key card in the air as she did a little dance.

Ari slid her key card into her bra as she did a little dance of her own, glancing up at Vergil with a small smile. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as he watched her before giving her a smile of his own. He was glad to finally get some kind of attention from her that was in his favor, even if it was brief.

"Okay, we can stop by and drop off you guy's luggage first and then we'll take the cart with our stuff to our room afterward." Trish planned as she walked toward the elevators.

"Sounds good. "Ari followed suit.

Dante and Vergil exchanged looks before following after them. As they walked away, the police officer who had been watching the TV, had stopped to watched them until they disappeared behind the elevator doors.


End file.
